One of the greatest gifts a parent can give a child is to help them become ‘emotionally articulate,’ i.e. able to recognise, express and manage their own feelings. This is a skill developed over time, as the terrible twos –when tantrums are often caused by a child’s frustration at not being understood or listened to—give way to increasingly mature and reasoned behavior around the age of 3 and 4, when the 4+ assessments for entry into selective independent schools take place. As a mother of four, I have been through this developmental stage with my own children several times. I know first hand they won’t have all reached the same level of emotional maturity at that age and may thus react very differently to meeting new people in an unknown setting where they will be expected to follow instructions and rules. As a former teacher who used to conduct 4+ assessments at a top prep school, I...